詩篇譯文瑕疵剖析(IV)
61-80
61. 49:7-9 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 無人能贖回他人性命,
或替人把贖價交給神;
因生命贖價非常昂貴,
任何人都永遠付不清.
而且他必須永活不朽,
才可以實際上做得到.
原譯: 一個也無法贖自己的弟兄,
也不能替他將贖價給神,
叫他且長遠活著,
不見朽壞,
因為贖他生命的價值極貴,
只可永遠罷休.
英文: No man can redeem the life of another
or give to God a ransome for him -
the ransome for a life is costly,
no payment is ever enough -
that he should live on forever
and not see decay.
說明: 1. the life of another 應譯 "他人性命" 非 "自己的弟兄"
2. no payment is ever enough 應譯 "永遠都付不清" 非 "只可永遠罷休"
62. 49:10-12 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 大家都看見智慧人會死,
愚頑人和無知人也會亡;
且他們把財富留給別人.
他們雖以自己名命己地,
以己墓作自己永遠房舍,
作他們萬代無窮的居所.
惜人即使富有也難長久,
跟牲畜一樣全都會死亡.
原譯: 他必見智慧人死,
又見愚頑人和畜類人一同滅亡,
將他們的財貨留給別人.
他們心裏思想, 他們的家室必永存,
住宅必留到萬代;
他們以自己的名稱自己的地.
但人居尊貴中不能長久,
如同死亡的畜類一樣.
英文: For all can see that wise men die;
the foolish and the senseless alike perish
and leave their wealth to others.
Their tombs will remain their houses forever,
their dwellings for endless generations,
though they had named lands after themselves.
But man, despite his riches, does not endure;
he is like the beasts that perish.
說明: 1. the senseless 應譯 "無知人" 非 "畜類人" 雅達.
2. Their tombs will remain their houses forever,
應譯 "以己墓作自己永遠房舍" 非 "他們心裏思想, 他們的家室必永存"
3. man, despite his riches 應譯 "人即使富有" 非 "人居尊貴中"
4. he is like the beasts that perish.
應譯 "跟牲畜一樣全都會死亡" 非 "如同死亡的畜類一樣"
63. 49:13-15 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 這就是那信靠自己的命運,
也是認同追隨他們的下場.
他們像羊群注定要下陰間,
而且死亡在不斷餵養他們.
正直的人早晨來管理他們;
他們的形體遠離他們豪宅,
並且在墓中漸漸腐朽消滅.
但神必救我脫離陰間,
祂必接我到祂那裏去.
原譯: 他們行的這道, 本為自己的愚昧,
他們以後的人還佩服他們的話語.
他們如同羊群派定下陰間,
死亡必作他們的牧者.
到了早晨, 正直的人必管轄他們.
他們的美容必被陰間所滅,
以致無處可存.
只是神必救贖我的靈魂脫離陰間的權柄,
因他必收納我.
英文: This is the fate of those who trust in themselves,
and of their followers, who approve their sayings.
Like sheep they are destined for the grave,
and death will feed on them.
The upright will rule over them in the morning;
their forms will decay in the grave,
far from their princely mansions.
But God will redeem my life from the grave;
he will surely take me to himself.
說明: 1. 第13節完全誤譯, 應改如新譯.
2. their forms will decay in the grave, far from their princely mansions 完全誤譯,
應改譯: "他們的形體遠離他們豪宅, 並且在墓中漸漸腐朽消滅"
非 "他們的美容必被陰間所滅, 以致無處可存"
3. But God will redeem my life from the grave
應譯 "但神必救我脫離陰間" 非 "只是神必救贖我的靈魂脫離陰間的權柄"
4. he will surely take me to himself
應譯 "祂必接我到祂那裏去" 非 "因他必收納我"
64. 49:16-19 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 見人發財, 炫耀豪宅,
不必驚訝.
因他死時甚麼都帶不走,
他的榮華也不能隨他去.
他活著之日, 自認有福;
興旺昌盛時, 人人誇讚.
他要回到歷代列祖那裏,
永遠都看不見生命的光.
原譯: 見人發財, 家室增榮的時候,
你不要懼怕.
因為他死的時候, 甚麼也不能帶去,
他的榮耀不能隨他下去.
他活著的時候, 雖然自誇為有福
(你若利己, 人必誇獎你),
他仍必歸到他歷代列祖的祖宗那裏,
永不見光.
英文: Do not be overawed when a man grows rich,
when the splendor of his house increases;
for he will take nothing with him when he dies,
his splendor will not descend with him.
Though while he lived he counted himself blessed -
and men praise you when you prosper -
he will join the generation of his fathers,
who will never see the light of life.
說明: 1. the splendor of his house increases 應譯 "炫耀豪宅" 非 "家室增榮"
Do not be overawed 應譯 "不必驚訝" 非 "不要懼怕"
2. and men praise you when you peosper -
應譯 "興旺昌盛時, 人人誇讚" 非 "(你若利己, 人必誇獎你)"
3. who will never see the light of life.
應譯 "永遠都看不見生命的光" 非 "永不見光"
65. 49:20 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 富有看不透世事的人,
跟牲畜一樣都會死亡.
原譯: 人在尊貴中而不醒悟,
就如死亡的畜類一樣.
英文: A man who has riches without understanding
is like the beasts that perish.
說明: 1. A man who has riches without understanding
誤譯 "富有看不透世事的人" 非 "人在尊貴中而不醒悟"
2. like the beasts that perish
應譯 "跟牲畜一樣都會死亡" 非 "就如死亡的畜類一樣"
66. 52:1-4 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 強人啊! 為何吹噓罪惡?
為何終日自誇?
在神眼中你真可恥.
你的舌頭詭詐毀人,
像一把鋒利的剃刀.
你愛邪惡不愛美善;
你愛撒謊不愛吐實.
你詭詐的舌頭啊!
你愛說傷人的話.
原譯: 勇士啊! 你為何以作惡自誇?
神的慈愛是常存的.
你的舌頭邪惡詭詐,
好像剃頭刀快利傷人.
你愛惡勝似愛善,
又愛撒謊, 不愛說公義.
詭詐的舌頭啊,
你愛說一切毀滅的話.
英文: Why do you boast evil, you mighty man?
Why do you boast all day long?
you who are a disgrace in the eyes of God.
Your tongue plots destruction;
it is like a sharpened razor, you who practice deceit.
You love evil rather than good,
falsehood rether than speaking the truth
You love every harmful word;
O you deceitful tongue!
說明: 1. mighty man 譯 "強人" 較 "勇士" 切合原意.
2. boast of evil 譯 "吹噓罪惡" 較 "作惡自誇" 恰切.
3. 未將 "Why do you boast all day long(為何終日自誇) 譯出, 應補上.
4. you who are a disgrace in the eyes of God
應譯 "在神眼中你真可恥" 非 "神的慈愛是常存的"
5. it is like a sharpened razor
譯 "像一把鋒利的剃刀" 較 "好像剃頭刀快利傷人" 雅達.
6. You love evil rather than good
7. speaking the truth 應譯 "不愛吐實" 非 "不愛說公義"
8. You love every harmful word
應譯 "你愛說傷人的話" 非 "你愛說一切毀滅的話"
67. 52:5-7 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 然而神必定會把你永遠毀滅;
衪會把你從帳棚中抓出撕碎,
更把你從活人之地連根拔起.
義人看見會懼怕,
他們會嘲笑他說:
"看哪! 這就是那不靠神庇護的人,
只倚靠自己豐盛財富,
去毀滅別人壯大自己."
原譯: 神也要毀滅你, 直到永遠;
也要把你拿去, 從你的帳棚中抽出,
從活人之地將你拔出.
義人看見而懼怕,
並要笑他.
. 說: "看哪! 這就是那不以神為他力量的人,
只倚仗他豐富的財物,
在邪惡上堅立自己."
英文: Surely God will bring you down to everlasting ruin;
He will snatch you up and tear you from your tent;
he will uproot you from the land of the living.
The righteous will see and fear;
they will laugh at him, saying,
"Here now is the man who did not make God his stronghold
but trusted in his great wealth
and grew strong by destroying others!"
說明: 1. He will snatch you up and tear you from your tent
應譯 "衪會把你從帳棚中抓出撕碎" 非 "也要把你拿去, 從你的帳棚中抽出"
2. he will uproot you from the land of the living
譯 "更把你從活人之地連根拔起" 較 "從活人之地將你拔出" 切合原意.
3. did not make God his stronghold
應譯 "這就是那不靠神庇護的人" 非 "這就是那不以神為他力量的人"
4. grew strong by destroying others
應譯 "去毀滅別人壯大自己" 非 "在邪惡上堅立自己"
68. 55:9-11 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 主啊! 求你困擾惡人,
攪亂他們的言語;
我見城中暴亂爭鬥.
他們晝夜出沒城牆,
惡行凌虐瀰漫全城.
毀滅力量肆虐城中,
威嚇謊言不離街頭.
原譯: 主啊! 求你吞滅他們,
變亂他們的舌頭.
因為我在城中見了強爭競的事.
他們在城牆上晝夜繞行,
在城內也有罪孽和奸惡.
邪惡在其中,
欺壓和詭詐不離街市.
英文: Confuse the wicked, O Lord,
confound their speech,
for I see violence and strife in the city.
Day and night they prowl about on its walls;
malice and abuse are within it.
Destructive forces are at work in the city;
threats and lies never leave its streets.
說明: 1. Confuse the wicked, O Lord
應譯 "主啊! 求你困擾惡人" 非 "主啊! 求你吞滅他們"
2. I see violence and strife in the city
應譯 "我見城中暴亂爭鬥" 非 "因為我在城中見了強爭競的事"
3. prowl about 應譯 "出沒" 非 "繞行"
4. malice and abuse are within it.
應譯 "惡行凌虐瀰漫全城" 非 "在城內也有罪孽和奸惡"
5. Destructive forces are at work in the city
應譯 "毀滅力量肆虐城中" 非 "邪惡在其中"
6. threats and lies 應譯 "威嚇謊言" 非 "欺壓和詭詐"
69. 55:12-14 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 若是仇敵羞辱我, 尚可忍耐,
若是仇家反抗我, 尚可躲避;
不料是你! 與我推心置腹,
你是我的良伴, 我的密友.
以往你曾經與我親密交往,
也常在神殿中與群眾同行.
原譯: 原來不是仇敵辱罵我,
若是仇敵, 還可忍耐;
也不是恨我的人向我狂大,
若是恨我的人, 就必躲避他.
不料是你! 你原與我平等,
是我的同伴, 是我知己的朋友.
我們素常彼此談論, 以為甘甜,
我們與群眾在神的殿中同行.
英文: If an enemy were insulting me, I could endure it;
if a foe were raising himself aginst me, I could hide from him.
But it is you a man like myself,
my companion, my close friend,
with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship
as we walked with the throng at the house of God.
說明: 1. If an enemy were insulting me, I could endure it
應譯 "若是仇敵羞辱我, 尚可忍耐"
非 "原來不是仇敵辱罵我, 若是仇敵, 還可忍耐"
2. if a foe were raising himself aginst me, I could hide from him.
應譯 "若是仇家反抗我, 尚可躲避"
非 "也不是恨我的人向我狂大, 若是恨我的人, 就必躲避他"
3. But it is you a man like myself
應譯 "不料是你! 與我推心置腹" 非 "不料是你! 你原與我平等"
4. with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship
應譯 "以往你曾經與我親密交往" 非 "我們素常彼此談論, 以為甘甜"
70. 55:18-19 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 衪從反抗我的戰場中,
即使反抗我的人眾多,
衪毫髮無傷救贖了我.
那永遠坐著為王的神,
對永不悔改不畏神者,
願你聽到他們的聲音,
就立即嚴厲懲治他們.
原譯: 他救贖我命脫離攻擊我的人,
使我得享平安,
因為與我相爭的人甚多.
那沒有更變,
不敬畏神的人,
從太古常存的的神,
必聽見而苦待他.
英文: He ransoms me unharmed
from the battle waged against me,
even though many oppose me.
God, who is enthroned forever,
will hear them and afflict them -
men who never change their ways
and have no fear of God.
說明: 1. He ransoms me unharmed from the battle waged against me
應譯 "衪從反抗我的戰場中, 衪毫髮無傷救贖了我"
非 "他救贖我命脫離攻擊我的人, 使我得享平安"
2. even though many oppose me
譯 "即使反抗我的人眾多" 較 "因為與我相爭的人甚多" 恰切.
3. God, who is enthroned forever
譯 "那永遠坐著為王的神" 較 "從太古常存的的神" 恰切.
4. men who never change their ways and have no fear of God
譯 "對永不悔改不畏神者" 較 "那沒有更變, 不敬畏神的人" 恰切.
5. will hear them and afflict them
應譯 "願你聽到他們的聲音, 就立即嚴厲懲治他們" 非 "必聽見而苦待他"
71. 56:1-2 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 神啊! 求你憐憫我,
因為人緊迫追逐我,
並終日緊迫攻擊我.
我仇敵終日追趕我,
並趾高氣揚攻擊我.
原譯: 神啊! 求你憐憫我!
因為人要把我吞了,
終日攻擊欺壓我.
我的仇敵終日要把我吞了,
因逞驕傲攻擊我的人甚多.
英文: Be merciful to me, O God,
for men hotly pursue me;
all day long they press their attack.
My slanderers pursue me all day long;
many are attacking me in their pride.
說明: 1. for men hotly pursue me
應譯 "因為人緊迫追逐我" 非 "因為人要把我吞了"
2. My slanderers pursue me all day long
應譯 "我仇敵終日追趕我" 非 "我的仇敵終日要把我吞了"
3. many are attacking me in their pride
應譯 "並趾高氣揚攻擊我" 非 "因逞驕傲攻擊我的人甚多"
72. 56:7-8 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 沒理由讓他們逃脫,
神啊! 求你在忿怒中打倒列國.
求你記錄我的哀傷;
把我眼淚裝入你的酒囊,
這不都記在你的冊上嗎?
原譯: 他們豈能因罪孽逃脫嗎?
神啊! 求你在怒中使眾民墮落.
記錄我幾次流離, 你都記數.
求你把我眼淚裝在你的皮袋裏,
這不都記在你冊子上嗎?
英文: On no account let them escape;
in your anger, O God, bring down the nations.
Record my lament;
put my tears in your wineskin -
are they not in your record?
說明: 1. On no account let them escape
應譯 "沒理由讓他們逃脫" 非 "他們豈能因罪孽逃脫嗎"
2. in your anger, O God, bring down the nations
應譯 "神啊! 求你在忿怒中打倒列國" 非 "神啊! 求你在怒中使眾民墮落"
3. Record my lament 應譯 "求你記錄我的哀傷" 非 "記錄我幾次流離, 你都記數"
73. 56:12-13 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 神啊! 我向你許過願,
我要向你獻上感謝祭.
因你從死亡中救出我,
使我的腳穩步前行;
能夠在生命的光中,
在真神的面前行走.
原譯: 神啊! 我向你所許的願在我身上,
我要將感謝祭獻給你.
因為你救我的命脫離死亡.
你豈不是救護我的腳不跌倒,
使我在生命光中,
行在神前面嗎?
英文: I am under vows to you, O God;
I will present my thank offering to you.
For you have delivered me from death
and my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before God
in the light of life.
說明: 1. I am under vows to you
應譯 "我向你許過願" 非 "我向你所許的願在我身上"
2. my feet from stumbling
應譯 "使我的腳穩步前行" 非 "你豈不是救護我的腳不跌倒"
3. I may walk before God in the light of life
應譯 "能夠在生命的光中, 在真神的面前行走"
非 "使我在生命光中, 行在神前面嗎"
74. 57:2-3 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 我要向至高神呼求,
向為我成就衪旨意的神呼求.
祂從天上施恩拯救我,
責罰緊迫追逐我的人;
衪向我大施慈愛信實.
原譯: 我要求告至高的神,
就是為我成全諸事的神.
那要吞我的人辱罵我的時候,
神從天上必施恩救我,
也必向我發出慈愛和誠實.
英文: I cry out to God Most High,
to God, who fufills his purpose for me.
He sends from heaven and saves me,
rebuking those who hotly pursue me;
God sends his love and his faithfulness.
說明: 1. to God, who fufills his purpose for me.
譯 "向為我成就衪旨意的神呼求" 較 "就是為我成全諸事的神" 切合原意.
2. rebuking those who hotly pursue me
應譯 "責罰緊迫追逐我的人" 非 "那要吞我的人辱罵我的時候"
3. fulfill his purpose 應譯 "成就衪旨意" 非 "成全諸事"
75. 57:4 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 我身陷獅子群裏,
躺在餓極野獸中;
他們的齒如槍箭,
他們的舌似利劍.
原譯: 我的性命在獅子中間,
我躺臥在性如烈火的世人當中.
他們的牙齒是槍、箭;
他們的舌頭是快刀.
英文: I am in the midst of lions;
I lie among ravenous beasts -
men whose teeth are spears and arrows,
whose tongues are sharp swords.
說明: 1. I am in the midst of lions
譯 "我身陷獅子群裏" 較 "我的性命在獅子中間" 切合原意.
2. I lie among ravenous beasts
應譯 "躺在餓極野獸中" 非 "我躺臥在性如烈火的世人當中"
76. 57:6 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 他們在我腳下撒羅網,
為要逼使我屈服低頭;
他們在我路上挖深坑,
反而自己掉入坑穴中.
原譯: 他們為我的腳設下網羅,
壓制我的心.
他們在我面前挖了坑,
自己反掉在其中.
英文: They spread a net for my feet -
I was bowed down in distress.
They dug a pit in my path -
but they have fallen into it themselves.
說明: 1. spread a net 譯 "撒羅網" 較 "設下羅網" 切合原意.
2. I was bowed down in distress
應譯 "為要逼使我屈服低頭" 非 "壓制我的心"
77. 58:1-2 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 你們掌權的人真的講公義嗎?
你們審判的人真公正審判嗎?
不是的, 你們心謀不公不義,
你們手在地上行暴肆虐.
原譯: 世人哪, 你們默然不語, 真合公義嗎?
施行審判, 豈按正直嗎?
不然, 你們是心中作惡,
你們在地上秤出你們手所行的強暴.
英文: Do you rulers indeed speak justly?
Do you judge uprightly among men?
No, in your heart you devise injustice;
and your hands mete out violence on the earth.
說明: 1. Do you rulers indeed speak justly?
rulers 應譯 "掌權的人" 非 一般 "世人," 並無 "你們默然不語" 之意, 應改正.
2. Do you judge uprightly among men?
應譯 "你們審判的人真公正審判嗎" 非 "施行審判, 豈按正直嗎" 應與上句對稱.
3. No, in your heart you devise injustice
應譯 "不是的, 你們心謀不公不義" 非 "不然, 你們是心中作惡"
4. your hands mete out violence on the earth
應譯 "你們手在地上行暴肆虐" 非 "你們在地上秤出你們手所行的強暴"
78. 58:3-5 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 惡人生下來就走上歧途,
一出母胎裏就任性說謊.
他們惡毒像蛇毒,
且是耳聾的毒蛇.
聽不見弄蛇人吹奏的聲調,
不管他功力多高都聽不見.
原譯: 惡人一出母胎, 就與神疏遠;
一離母胎, 便走錯路, 說謊話.
他們的毒氣好像蛇的毒氣,
他們好像塞耳的聾虺,
不聽行法術的聲音,
雖用極靈的符咒, 也是不聽.
英文: Even from birth the wicked go astray;
from the womb they are wayward and speak lies.
Their venom like the venom of a snake,
like that of a cobra that has stopped its ears,
that will not heed the tune of the charmer,
however skillful the enchanter may be.
說明: 1. go astray 應譯 "走上歧途" 非 "與神疏遠"
2. wayward 應譯 "任性" 非 "走錯路"
3. Their venom like the venom of a snake
譯 "他們惡毒像蛇毒" 較 "他們的毒氣好像蛇的毒氣" 簡明通順.
4. like that of a cobra that has stopped its ears
應譯 "且是耳聾的毒蛇" 非 "他們好像塞耳的聾虺"
5. charmer 應譯 "弄蛇人" 非 "行法術的" / tune 應譯 "吹奏的聲調" 非 一般"聲音"
6. however skillful the enchanter may be
應譯 "不管他功力多高都聽不見" 非 "雖用極靈的符咒, 也是不聽"
79. 59:6-8 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 這些歹徒傍晚回來,
像狗狂吠出沒城中.
看看他們口吐何物?
吐出的竟然是刀劍,
並說: "誰能聽見我們?"
然而, 主啊! 你譏笑他們,
你嘲笑萬國.
原譯: 他們晚上轉回,
叫號如狗. 圍城繞行.
他們口中吐出惡言,
嘴裏有刀.
他們說: "有誰聽見?"
但你耶和華必笑話他們,
你要嗤嘲笑萬邦.
英文: They return at evening,
snarling like dog, and prowl about the city.
See what they spew from their mouths -
they spew out swords from their lips,
and they say, "Who can hear us?"
But you, O Lord, laugh at them,
you scoff at all those nations.
說明: 1. prowl about the city 應譯 "出沒城中" 非 "圍城繞行"
2. See what they spew from their mouths
應譯 "看看他們口吐何物" 非 "他們口中吐出惡言"
3. they spew out swords from their lips
應譯 "吐出的竟然是刀劍" 非 "嘴裏有刀"
4. laugh at 譯 "譏笑" 較 "笑話" 切合原意.
80. 59:10-11 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾如新譯,
新譯: 神要在我面前帶領我,
讓我暗笑中傷我的人.
主啊, 你是我們的盾牌!
求你不要殺他們, 免我的子民忘懷;
求你用你的大能, 使他們四散倒下.
原譯: 我的神要以慈愛迎接我.
神要我看見我仇敵遭報.
不要殺他們, 恐怕我的民忘記.
主啊, 你是我的盾牌,
求你用你的能力使他們四散, 且降為卑.
英文: God will go before me
and will let me gloat over those who slander me.
But do not kill them, O Lord our shield,
or my people will forget.
In your might make them wander about, and bring them down.
說明: 1. God will go before me
應譯 "神要在我面前帶領我" 非 "我的神要以慈愛迎接我"
2. and will let me gloat over those who slander me
應譯 "讓我暗笑中傷我的人" 非 "神要我看見我仇敵遭報"
3. In your might make them wander about, and bring them down
應譯 "求你用你的大能, 使他們四散倒下"
非 "求你用你的能力使他們四散, 且降為卑"