詩篇譯文瑕疵剖析(III)
41-60
41. 27:13-14 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 我對此仍充滿信心:
在這活人之地,
我可看見耶和華的美善.
要等候耶和華!
要剛強堅定,
等候耶和華!
原譯: 我若不信在活人之地,
得見耶和華的恩惠,
就早已喪膽了.
要等候耶和華!
當壯膽, 堅固你的心.
我再說: 要等候耶和華!
英文: I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord
in the land of living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.
說明: 1. 第13節英文本係肯定語氣, 非假設語氣, 且無 "就早已喪膽了" 之意, 應改正.
the goodness 譯 "美善" 較 "恩惠" 切合原意.
2. be strong and take heart
譯 "要剛強堅定" 較 "當壯膽, 堅固你的心" 簡明恰切.
3. and wait for the Lord
譯 "等候耶和華!" 較 "我再說: 要等候耶和華" 簡明恰切.
英文本無 "我再說" 應刪除.
42. 28:1-2 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 耶和華我的磬石啊! 我向你呼求,
求你不要掩耳不聽.
因你若仍緘默不語,
我就像陰間的死人.
當我向你的至聖所,
舉手呼求賜助之時;
求垂聽我憐憫呼求.
原譯: 耶和華啊, 我要求告你;
我的磬石啊, 不要向我緘默;
徜若你向我閉口,
我就如將死的人一樣.
我呼求你,
向你至聖所舉手的時候,
求你垂聽我懇求的聲音!
英文: To you I call, O Lord my Rock;
do not turn a deaf ear to me.
For if you remain silent,
I will be like those who have gone down to the pit.
Hear my cry for mercy
as I call to you for help,
as I lift up my hamds toward your Most Holy Place.
說明: 1. turn a deaf ear 譯 "掩耳不聽" 較 "緘默" 切合原意.
remain silent 譯 "緘默不語" 較 "向我閉口" 雅達.
2. I will be like those who have gone down to the pit
譯 "我就像陰間的死人" 較 "我就如將死的人一樣" 切合原意.
3. Hear my cry for mercy
應譯 "求垂聽我憐憫呼求" 非 "求你垂聽我懇求的聲音"
4. as I call to you for help, as I lift up my hamds toward your Most Holy Place
應譯 "當我向你的至聖所, 舉手呼求賜助之時"
非 "我呼求你, 向你至聖所舉手的時候"
43. 29:6-9 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 祂使黎巴嫩跳躍如牛犢,
使西連跳躍如野公牛犢.
耶和華的聲音
隨著閃電劈下.
耶和華的聲音震動曠野,
耶和華震動加低斯曠野.
耶和華的聲音猛扭橡樹,
使所有林木的葉落光禿.
在衪殿中的都驚呼: "榮耀!"
原譯: 他也使之跳躍如牛犢,
使黎巴嫩和西連跳躍如野牛犢.
耶和華的聲音
使火焰分岔.
耶和華的聲音震動曠野,
耶和華震動加低斯的曠野.
耶和華的聲音驚動母鹿落胎,
樹木也脫落淨光.
凡在他殿中的, 都稱說他的榮耀.
英文: He makes Lebanon skip like a calf,
Sirion like a young wild ox.
The voice of the Lord strikes
with flashes of lightning.
The voice of the Lord shakes the desert;
the Lord shakes the Desert of Kadesh.
The voice of the Lord twists the oaks
and strips the forests bare.
And in his temple all cry, "Glory!"
說明: 1. 原文分述: 黎巴嫩跳躍如牛犢 / 西連跳躍如野公牛犢; 中譯顯未分清.
2. strike with fleshes of lightning 應譯 "隨著閃電劈下" 非 "使火焰分岔"
3. twists the oak 譯 "扭動橡樹" 上下文呼應, 較合邏輯.
原譯採另一版本 "Lord makes the deer give birth" 似格格不入.
4. strips the forests bare 譯 "使所有林木的葉落光禿" 較 "樹木也脫落淨光" 雅達.
5. all cry, "Glory! 譯 "都驚呼 '榮耀!'" 較 "都稱說他的榮耀" 簡潔有力.
44. 29:10-11 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 耶和華坐洪水上為王,
耶和華永遠坐著為王!
願耶和華賜力量給祂的子民,
願耶和華賜平安給祂的子民!
原譯: 洪水泛濫之時, 耶和華坐著為王,
耶和華坐著為王, 直到永遠.
耶和華必賜力量給他的百姓,
耶和華必賜平安;的福給他的百姓!
英文: The Lord sits enthroned over the flood;
the Lord is enthroned as King forever.
The Lord gives strength to his people;
the Lord blesses his people with peace.
說明: 1. The Lord sits enthroned over the flood
應譯 "耶和華坐洪水上為王" 非 "洪水泛濫之時, 耶和華坐著為王"
over the flood 指現狀非時間, 故非 "洪水泛濫之時"
2. the Lord blesses his people with peace.
譯 "願耶和華賜平安給祂的子民" 較 "耶和華必賜平安;的福給他的百姓" 切合原意.
45. 31:9-10 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 耶和華啊! 求你憐憫我,
因為我陷身患難之中;
我的眼睛因愁煩昏花,
且我的身心滿是憂傷.
我的生命因愁苦耗盡,
歲月在呻吟之中消逝,
我的精力因困苦衰退,
我的身體也日益衰弱.
原譯: 耶和華啊! 求你憐恤我,
因為我在急難之中;
我的眼睛因憂愁乾癟,
連我的身心也不安舒.
我的生命為愁苦所消耗,
我的年歲為嘆息所曠廢,
我的力量因我的罪孽衰敗,
我的骨頭也枯乾.
英文: Be merciful to me, O Lord,
for I am in distress;
my eyes grow weak with sorrow,
my soul and my body with grief.
My life is consumed by anguish
and my years by groaning;
my strength fails because of my affliction,
and my bones grow weak.
說明: 1. distress 譯 "患難" 較 "急難" 恰切.
2. go weak 應譯 "昏花" 非 "乾癟"
3. with grief 應譯 "憂傷" 非 "不安舒"
4. consumed by groaning 應譯 "呻吟之中消逝 "非 "嘆息所曠廢"
5. my strength fails because of my affliction,
譯 "我的精力因困苦衰退" 較 "我的力量因我的罪孽衰敗" 恰切.
6. bones go weak 應譯 "身體也日益衰弱" 非 "骨頭也乾枯"
46. 31:21-22 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 耶和華是應當讚美的!
因當我身陷圍困城中,
祂向我顯示奇妙慈愛.
我在警覺清醒時曾說:
"我在你的眼前被隔絕!"
然而當我呼叫求救時,
你仍垂聽我憐憫呼求.
原譯: 耶和華是應當稱頌的!
因為他在堅固城裏
向我施展奇妙的慈愛.
至於我, 我曾急促地說:
"我從你眼前被隔絕."
然而, 我呼求你的時候,
你仍聽我懇求的聲音.
英文: Praise be to the Lord,
for he showed his wonderful love to me
when I was in a besieged city.
In my alarm I said,
"I am cut off from your sight!"
Yet you heard my cry for mercy
when I called to you for help.
說明: 1. when I was in a besieged city
應譯 "當我身陷圍困城中" 非 "他在堅固城裏"
2. In my alarm I said
應譯 "我在警覺清醒時曾說" 非 "至於我, 我曾急促地說"
3. Yet you heard my cry for mercy
譯 "你仍垂聽我憐憫呼求" 較 "你仍聽我懇求的聲音" 恰切.
47. 32:3-5 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 我閉嘴不認罪的時侯,
就終日呻吟體力日衰.
你的手日夜重壓我身,
使我的精力日益耗竭,
如在盛夏酷熱中枯乾.
我才向你承認我的罪,
更進一步坦白我的惡;
並說: "我要向耶和華承認我的過犯."
你就赦免了我的罪惡.
原譯: 我閉嘴不認罪的時侯,
因終日唉哼而骨頭枯乾.
黑夜白日, 你的手在我身上沉重,
我的精液耗盡,
如同夏天的乾旱.
我向你陳明我的罪,
不隱瞞我的惡.
並說: "我要向耶和華承認我的過犯."
你就赦免我的罪惡.
英文: When I kept silent, my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.
For day and night your hand was heavy upon me;
my strength was sapped
as in the heat of summer.
Then I acknowledged my sin to you
and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the Lord."
and you forgave the guilt of my sin.
說明: 1. my bones wasted away, through my groaning all day long
應譯 "就終日呻吟體力日衰" 非 "因終日唉哼而骨頭枯乾"
2. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me;
譯 "你的手日夜重壓我身" 較 "黑夜白日, 你的手在我身上沉重" 簡潔達意.
3. my strength was sapped
應譯 "使我的精力日益耗竭"非 "我的精液耗盡"
4. as in the heat of summer
譯 "如在盛夏酷熱中枯乾" 較 "如同夏天的乾旱" 恰切.
5. acknowledged 譯 "承認" 較 "陳明" 切合原意.
48. 35:13-15 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 當他們生病的時候,
我卻穿上麻衣禁食;
當我禱告沒回應時,
我奔走哀號, 待他們如友好兄弟;
我低頭悲痛, 如為自己母親哀哭.
但我跌倒時, 他們竟聚首稱慶,
我沒防備時, 他們集結攻擊我.
他們不斷地公然毀謗我.
原譯: 至於我, 當他們有病的時候,
我便穿麻衣, 禁食, 刻苦己心,
我所求的都歸到自己的懷中.
我這樣行, 好像他是我的朋友, 我的弟兄;
我屈身悲哀, 如同人為母親哀痛.
我在患難中, 他們卻歡喜, 大家聚集;
我所不認識的那些下流人聚集攻擊我,
他們不住地把我撕裂.
英文: Yet when they were ill, I put on sackcloth
and humbled myself with fasting.
When my prayers returned to me unanswered,
I went about mourning as though for my friend or brother.
I bowed my head in grief as though weeping for my mother.
But when I stumble, they gather in glee;
attackers gathered against me when I was unaware.
They slandered me without ceasing.
說明: 1. I put on sackcloth and humbled myself with fasting
譯 "我卻穿上麻衣禁食" 較 "我便穿麻衣, 禁食, 刻苦己心" 切合原意.
2. When my prayers returned to me unanswered
應譯 "當我禱告沒回應時" 非 "我所求的都歸到自己的懷中"
3. I went about mourning as though for my friend or brother.
應譯 "我奔走哀號, 待他們如友好兄弟" 非 "我這樣行, 好像他是我的朋友, 我的弟兄"
4. I bowed my head in grief as though weeping for my mother.
譯 "我低頭悲痛, 如為自己母親哀哭" 較 "我屈身悲哀, 如同人為母親哀痛" 恰切.
5. when I stumble 應譯 "但我跌倒時," 非 "我在患難中"
6. they gather in glee 譯 "他們竟聚首稱慶" 較 "他們卻歡喜, 大家聚集" 通順恰切.
7. attackers 指上節 "他們" 非 "我所不認識的那些下流人"
8. slandered 應譯 "毀謗" 非 "撕裂"
49. 36:1-4 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 一則有關惡人罪行的聖言,
深藏我心:
"他的眼中不怕神!"
因在他眼中他自誇自媚,
以致不察不恨自己罪惡.
口出言語盡是邪惡詭詐,
因此他不再是明智良善.
即使在床他也圖謀作惡,
執意行惡不再拒絕惡事.
原譯: 惡人的罪過在他心裏說:
"我眼中不怕神!"
他自誇自媚, 以為他的罪孽
終不顯露, 不被恨惡.
他口中的言語盡是罪孽詭詐,
他與智慧善行已經斷絕.
他在床上圖謀罪孽,
定意行不善的道, 不憎惡惡事.
英文: An oracle is within my heart
concerning the sinfulness of the wicked.
There is no fear of God before his eyes.
For in his own eyes he flatters himself
too much to detect or hate his sin.
The words of his mouth are wicked and deceitful;
he has ceased to be wise and to do good.
Even on his bed he plots evil;
he commits hiimself to a sinful course and does not reject what is wrong.
說明: 1. An oracle is within my heart concerning the sinfulness of the wicked
應譯 "一則有關惡人罪行的聖言, 深藏我心" 非 "惡人的罪過在他心裏說"
2. too much to detect or hate his sin.
應譯 "以致不察不恨自己罪惡" 非 "以為他的罪孽終不顯露, 不被恨惡"
3. wicked 應譯 "邪惡" 非 "罪孽"
4. he has ceased to be wise and to do good.
應譯 "他不再是明智良善" 非 "他與智慧善行已經斷絕"
50. 37:23-24 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠通順, 應予修正如新譯.
新譯: 耶和華若喜悅人的道路,
祂定必使他的腳步穩定.
即使失腳也不仆倒;
因耶和華手扶持他.
原譯: 義人的腳步被耶和華立定,
他的道路, 耶和華也喜愛.
他雖失腳, 也不至全身仆倒,
因為耶和華用手攙扶他.
英文: If the Lord delights in a man's way,
he makes his steps firm;
though he stumble, he will not fall,
for the Lord upholds him with his hand.
說明: 1. If the Lord delights in a man's way
應譯 "耶和華若喜悅人的道路" 非 "他的道路, 耶和華也喜愛"
2. he makes his steps firm;
應譯 "祂定必使他的腳步穩定" 非 "義人的腳步被耶和華立定"
51. 38:5-8 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠通順, 應予修正如新譯.
新譯: 因為我罪惡的愚眛,
我的傷口惡臭流膿.
我傷痛得彎身拳曲,
終日四處奔走哀號.
我的背也灼痛難熬,
我真的是體無完膚;
我疲弱被壓得粉碎;
心中苦痛不住呻吟.
原譯: 因我的愚眛,
我的傷惡臭流膿.
我疼痛, 大大拳曲,
終日哀痛.
我滿腰是火,
我的肉無一完全.
我被壓傷, 身體疲倦,
因心裏不安, 我就唉哼.
英文: My wounds fester and are loathsome
because of my sinful folly.
I am bowed down and brought very low;
all day long I go about mourning.
My back is filled with searing pain;
there is no health in my body.
I am feeble and utterly crushed;
I groan in anguish of heart.
說明: 1. because of my sinful folly
譯 "因為我罪惡的愚眛" 較 "因我的愚眛" 完整達意.
2. My back is filled with searing pain;
應譯 "我的背也灼痛難熬" 非 "我滿腰是火"
3. there is no health in my body
應譯 "我真的是體無完膚" 非 "我的肉無一完全"
4. I am feeble and utterly crushed
應譯 "我疲弱被壓得粉碎" 非 "我被壓傷, 身體疲倦"
5. I groan in anguish of heart
應譯 "心中苦痛不住呻吟" 非 "因心裏不安, 我就唉哼"
52. 39:4-6 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠通順工整, 應予修正如新譯.
新譯: "耶和華啊! 求你指示我,
我的人生結局如何,
我的歲數又有多少?
我的生命如何飛逝?
你使我的年日狹窄如手掌;
一生年歲在你面前如無有.
人的生命只不過是一口氣.
人生來去匆促不過是幻影,
孜孜營營只是場空;
積聚財寶不知為誰.
原譯: "耶和華啊! 求你叫我曉得
我身之終,
我的壽數幾何,
叫我知道我的生命不長.
你使我的年日狹窄如手掌;
我一生的年數, 在你面前如同無有.
各人最穩妥的時候, 真是全然虛幻.
世人行動實係幻影;
他們忙亂, 真是枉然;
積聚財寶, 不知將來有誰收取.
英文: 1. 新譯 "求你指示我" 較 "求你叫我曉得" 恰切.
2. my life's end 應譯 "我的人生結局如何" 非 "我身之終"
3. how fleeting is my life 應譯 "我的生命如何飛逝" 非 "我的生命不長"
4. Each man's life is but a breath
應譯 "人的生命只不過是一口氣" 非 "各人最穩妥的時候, 真是全然虛幻"
5. goes to and fro 應譯 "來去匆匆" 非 "行動"
6. He bustles about, but only in vain
譯 "孜孜營營只是場空" 較 "他們忙亂, 真是枉然" 雅達.
7. not knowing who will get it
應譯 "不知為誰" 非 "不知將來有誰收取"
53. 39:10-11 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠通順工整, 應予修正如新譯.
新譯: 求你除去降我身上災禍,
我承受不了你手的擊打.
你因人罪責罰管教他們,
你像蛀蟲蛀盡他們財富;
人的生命只不過是口氣.
原譯: 求你把你的責罰從我身上免去,
因你手的責打, 我便消滅.
你因人的罪惡懲罰他的時候,
叫他的笑容消滅, 如衣服被蟲所咬.
世人真是虛幻.
英文: Remove your scourge from me;
I am overcome by the blow of your hand.
You rebuke and discipline men for their sin;
you consume their wealth like a moth -
each man is but a breath.
說明: 1. scourge 應譯 "災禍" 非 "責罰"
2. I am overcome by the blow of your hand
應譯 "我承受不了你手的擊打" 非 "因你手的責打, 我便消滅"
3. you consume their wealth like a moth
應譯 "你像蛀蟲蛀盡他們財富" 非 "叫他的笑容消滅, 如衣服被蟲所咬"
4. each man is but a breath 應與第5節譯法一致
應譯 "人的生命只不過是口氣" 非 "世人真是虛幻"
54. 39:10-11 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠通順工整, 應予修正如新譯.
新譯: 耶和華啊! 求你垂聽我的禱告,
求你傾聽我的呼求;
求你勿充耳不聞我的哀哭,
因我在你面前像列祖一樣,
都是過路客旅全是寄居者.
在我去而不返之前,
求你不要怒目視我,
讓我仍可再度喜樂."
原譯: 耶和華啊! 求你聽我的禱告,
留心聽我的呼求!
我流淚, 求你不要靜默無聲,
因為我在你面前是客旅,
是寄居的, 像我列祖一樣.
求你寬容我,
使我在去而不返之先,
可以力量復原."
英文: Hear my prayer, O Lord,
listen to my cry for help;
be not deaf to my weeping.
For I dwell with you as an alien,
a stranger, as all my fathers were.
look away from me,
that I may rejoice again
before I depart and am no more."
說明: 1. be not deaf to my weeping
應譯 "求你勿充耳不聞我的哀哭" 非 "我流淚, 求你不要靜默無聲"
2. look away from me
應譯 "不要怒目視我" 非 "求你寬容我"
3. I may rejoice again
應譯 "讓我仍可再度喜樂" 非 "可以力量復原"
55. 40:4-5 原譯有誤, 西式語氣太重, 且欠通順工整, 應予修正如新譯.
新譯: 凡信靠耶和華,
不崇尚高傲, 遠離假神的人,
都是有福的.
耶和華我的神啊,
你行奇事何其多!
為我們籌劃的事真數算不清,
若要一一說出真是多不勝數.
原譯: 那倚靠耶和華,
不理會狂傲和偏向虛假之輩的,
這人便為有福.
耶和華我的神啊,
你所行的奇事
並你向我們所懷的意念甚多, 不能向你陳明;
若要陳明其事不可勝數.
英文: Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust,
who does not look to the pround,
to those who turn aside to false gods,
Many, O Lord my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us no one can recount to you,
were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare.
說明: 1. does not look to the proud 應譯 "不崇尚高傲" 非 "不理會狂傲"
2. turn aside to false gods 應譯 "遠離假神" 非 "偏向虛假"
3. The things you planned for us no one can recount to you,
應譯 "為我們籌劃的事真數算不清" 非 "並你向我們所懷的意念甚多, 不能向你陳明"
4. were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare
譯 "若要一一說出真是多不勝數" 較 "若要陳明其事不可勝數" 恰切雅達.
56. 31:9-10 原譯有誤, 且欠簡潔通順工整, 應加潤飾修正.
新譯: 所有我仇敵都耳語攻擊我;
他們心想我己陷絕境, 都說:
"他怪病纏身, 臥病在床,
再也起不來了!"
連與我共席進膳信賴摯友,
也舉起腳踢我!
原譯: 一切恨我的, 都交頭接耳語議論我;
他們設計要害我.
他們說: "有怪病貼在他身上;
他已躺臥, 必不能再起來."
連我知己的朋友,
我所倚靠吃過我飯的, 也用腳踢我!
英文: All my enemies whisper together against me;
they imagine the worst for me, saying,
"A vile desease has beset him;
he will never get up from the place where he lies."
Even my close friend, whom I trusted,
he who shared my bread, has lifted up his heel against me.
說明: 1. All my enemies whisper together against me
應譯 "所有我仇敵都耳語攻擊我" 非 "一切恨我的, 都交頭接耳語議論我"
2. they imagine the worst for me, saying,
應譯 "他們心想我己陷絕境, 都說:" 非 "他們設計要害我. 他們說:"
3. A vile desease has beset him
譯 "他怪病纏身" 較 "有怪病貼在他身上" 雅達.
4. he will never get up from the place where he lies
譯 "臥病在床, 再也起不來了" 較 "他已躺臥, 必不能再起來." 切合原意.
5. he who shared my bread,
應譯 "與我共席進膳" 非 "吃過我飯的" 雅達.
57. 42:5 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 我的心哪! 你為何憂煩?
為何在我裏面不安?
當仰望神, 我要讚美衪,
衪是我的救主我的神.
原譯: 我的心哪! 你為何憂悶?
為何在我裏面煩躁?
應當仰望神, 因他笑臉幫助我,
我還要稱讚他.
英文: Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.
說明: 1. disturbed 譯 "不安" 較 "煩躁" 切合原意.
2. my Savior and my God
應譯 "衪是我的救主我的神" 非 "因他笑臉幫助我"
58. 42:9-10 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 我向神我的磬石說:
"你為甚麼忘記我呢?
為何讓仇敵欺壓我,
使我四處奔走哀號?"
敵人整天辱罵並問我:
"你的神在那裏呢?"
使我身心受痛苦煎熬.
原譯: 我要對神我的磬石說:
"你為何忘記我呢?
我為何因仇敵的欺壓,
時常哀痛呢?"
我的敵人辱罵我, 好像打碎我的骨頭,
不住地對我說:
"你的神在哪裏呢?"
英文: I say to God my Rock,
"Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I go about mourning,
oppressed by the enemy?"
My bones suffer mortal agony as my foes taunt me,
saying to me all day long,
"Where is your God?"
說明: 1. Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy?
應譯 "為何讓仇敵欺壓我, 使我四處奔走哀號?"
非 "我為何因仇敵的欺壓, 時常哀痛呢?"
2. My bones suffer mortal agony
應譯 "使我身心受痛苦煎熬" 非 "好像打碎我的骨頭"
59. 45:1 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 我的心裏美辭泉湧;
當我為王朗頌我的詩章之時,
我的舌頭就像老練作家的筆.
原譯: 我心裏湧出美辭;
我論到我為王做的事,
我的舌頭是快手筆.
英文: My heart is stirred by a noble theme
as I recite my verses for the king;
my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.
說明: 1. My heart is stirred by a noble theme
譯 "我的心裏美辭泉湧" 較 "我心裏湧出美辭" 雅達.
2. as I recite my verses for the king
應譯 "當我為王朗頌我的詩章之時" 非 "我論到我為王做的事"
3. my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer
應譯 "我的舌頭就像老練作家的筆" 非 "我的舌頭是快手筆"
60. 45:2-3 原譯有誤, 且欠通順簡潔工整, 應加潤飾改正.
新譯: 地雖移動, 山沉海心,
狂濤怒吼, 白浪滔天,
山嶽震撼, 驚濤擊岸,
我們一點都不害怕.
原譯: 所以地雖改變, 山雖搖動到海心,
其中的水雖匉匐翻騰,
山雖因海漲而戰抖,
我們也不害怕.
英文: Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.
though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
說明: 1. the earth give way 譯 "地雖移動" 較 "地雖改變" 切合原意.
2. the mountains fall into the heart of the sea.
應譯 "山沉海心" 非 "山雖搖動到海心"
3. its waters roar and foam
應譯 "狂濤怒吼, 白浪滔天" 非 "其中的水雖匉匐翻騰"
4. the mountains quake with their surging
應譯 "山嶽震撼, 驚濤擊岸" 非 "山雖因海漲而戰抖"